I have heard the "How God Answers Prayer" sermon many, many times.
The preacher usually explains that God hears all prayers and answers them in one of three possible ways: Yes, No, or Wait a While. (Funny preachers will throw in the "Are you kidding me?!" answer as a fourth option.)
It never fails that the preacher uses praying for a spouse as an example of a prayer that might be answered with "Wait a While." (The preacher himself is always married. Bonus irony points if he was married before age twenty-two.)
The problem with that example is that "Wait" in this case looks an awfully lot like "No."
That's because marriage isn't a one-time thing. It is on-going. So being told to "Wait" to get married is almost like a series of "No"s:
Can I have a husband at 25? No.
At 30? No.
35? No.
When my siblings are all married? No.
When they all have kids? No.
When my friends are all married? No.
When I have to face that my parents are aging? No.
When I deal with tragedies? No.
When something really great happens to me and I want to share it? No
And I know some singletons have had to accept even harder "No"s:
Can I have a spouse by my side as I undergo treatment for cancer? No.
Can I be married before my parents are gone? No.
Before it's too late for me to have children of my own? No.
Singles are told:
Embrace this time God has given you.
Wait for the right person to be brought to you by God.
Honestly, I've grown weary of waiting.
I'm tired of "Wait"s that feel like "No"s.
But I keep praying.
God, when will you answer something other than "Wait"?
My child, just wait.
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